Love at first sight

A big thing happened to me over the summer, I became a godmother.  My best friend had her daughter in August, right when my internship ended.  I packed a bag and moved in with her and her boyfriend, and spent the last 2 weeks of my summer hanging out with a newborn.

No one really close to me has ever had a child before and I didn’t know what to expect or how I would feel.  But as soon as I saw her, when her dad carried her out to us in the waiting room right after she was born, I was instantly head over heels in love.  Here was this tiny brand new person just born, but I already knew her and I already loved her.  It was truly love at first sight.

Her arrival into this world was perfectly timed.  Shortly after she was born, my relationship with M. unravelled.  I experienced sadness so intense that I was physically in pain.  Other times I felt numb, completely void of anything and everything that made me human; I felt like a shell of my former self.  The only thing that made me feel remotely better was holding my god-daughter and letting her fall asleep against my chest.  She liked when I rocked her and sang to her, and she would fall asleep right up against my heart.  I could feel her warmth and calmness flowing throughout my body healing everything that was broken within me.  How funny that this tiny little six pound newborn can have such an effect on me and be able to help me in ways that no one else could.

Now, of course, she is no longer a tiny six pound newborn.  She is just over 2 months old now, and my friend tells me all about her little personality that is starting to come through.  She no longer sleeps all day like she did when I was with her.  She’s awake and alert and likes to stare at things and make funny noises.  I am so lucky and thankful that I get to be a part of her life, and she a part of mine.

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